The characters involved in the following conversation are Jack and Jill. (Who else did you expect after seeing the title?) Any resemblance with any person living, dead or any stage in between is unintentional.
This is what happened after Jack and Jill, involved in the making of the original rhyme, got up from their fall.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~X~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jack, disoriented after his long downward journey, tried to restore some order in the muddy situation. A budding actor, Jack knew how to react after a perceived head injury. There was the ‘Main kaun hoon?’ (Who am I?) stage followed by the ‘Main kahan hoon?’ (Where am I?) phase. However, seeing the murderous look in Jill’s eyes, Jack’s survival instincts surfaced and he said, meekly, “I’m sorry!”
“You’d better be. Sorry is all that you can say” said Jill.
“When you say that the only thing I can say – ”
“I mean another word out of you, and even a rat with a terminal toothache will pity you!”
“I did not sign up for this” muttered Jack. “This was supposed to be a routine job with easy money. The only hard work involved was fetching a pail of water. This was supposed to be a no risk job.”
“I know” sighed Jill “It was supposed to be easy- just climbing the hill is hardly an uphill task. You wouldn’t think those little kids with runny noses would enjoy violence, would you? And a little professionalism from you wouldn’t have hurt—who trips over his own feet??”
“Hey! Don’t give me that look. And anyways how was water supposed to be 'up the hill'? You would think water would flow down, right? How can it accumulate at the top?”
“That’s creative freedom for you” said the knowledgeable Jill.
“Can we sue them, for making us fall??” Jill added after a moments thought.
Jack pondered over this. He had made news in the infamous ‘Jack the bean stalker’*
case. The ecological committee was suing him for cutting down the huge beanstalk that led to the giant’s house as it was very rare plant. The giant was also pressing charges of breaking and entering, assault and 3 counts of racism. ‘I was targeted because I am a giant’ said the man-eating giant.
“No” concluded Jack “It won’t work. They will only set up a 3 member committee which will just be able to prove, after great deliberations, that there in fact, existed the said hill.”
“Then I suppose there really isn’t much we can do, right?” said Jill mulling over the unfairness of the whole situation.
“Yeah, perhaps we should just go home.”
Brooding on their unfortunate fall, the two left the set, (Jack is an actor, remember?) thinking about children and rocks— often in the same sentence.
~~~X~~~
On a totally unrelated incident, a few days later the entire set was destroyed in the night by a couple of people shouting slogans like—
Creating a rhyme,
Is committing a crime!
*Jack’s version of the story, where he portrays himself as the hero is the more popular one an account of aggressive publicity by his lawyers. It can be found here-
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_and_the_Beanstalk
1 comment:
Brilliant!!
You have a great imagination, buddy. You should take some more rhymes and rip them apart like Humpty Dumpty. What I loved about this piece is it's not just well conceived, but it's tidy and well worded. It's not flooded with heavy words, like most new writers tend to do. You know how to do it. With this lucid and simplistic style of writing, you can address a big audience.
Keep it up! :)
Tip: If you need some protein for the humor cells in your brain, dive into your pile of books and grab some Roald Dahls. Works wonders!
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